Are you selling or helping?

Our June 24th Post was titled: “It was a great party, until…” (review post here) It attracted some thoughtful comments.

My friend Rob submitted this comment: “People who advertise without connecting to the group are just another version of spamming. Many Facebook groups forbid it and will oust anyone who practices this.”

Rob then asks: “But what if someone knows of a problem many of them have and want to offer a solution? If this person accurately states the problem, others identify with it, and this person offers empathy and a solution, would that be selling? Zig Zigler would say, “Stop selling and start helping people.” Would that be okay?”

Thank you, Rob. I think your questions are very thought-provoking and interesting, and I would like to get everyone’s comments on Rob’s key question: “… would that be selling?”

Please comment for our Arghers community comment section below the post. And please comment on others’ comments too, if you like, and we’ll have a conversation. Arghs!

(You can always email me directly and confidentially with your insights or questions here: ) Or, do both!

Let’s sail! Argh, me hearties!
Cap’n John


  1. If you are letting them know what you perceive to be their problem, that could come off as judgy. This is a risky area. If you present it first as something you have personally struggled with and what helped you, that might come off as helpful.

    • John Parker

      Thank you, Melody. I like that we are thinking about how we approach others with our ideas. Is our core motive to sell or help? How will they take it? How are we coming across?

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